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10/20/11 - Ann Arbor, MI

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I MET TIGER WOODS AT BLIZZ CON

I’ve been playing World Of Warcraft non stop since 2003.  It’s my only real pleasure in life, and if I could permanently reside within the game I would.  Some of my best friends (and worst enemies) have come from World Of Warcraft, and I love it more than my family, my country, or God. 

I go to each and every Blizzard event than I can, and you can imagine my surprise when at the last Blizzard Convention I met Tiger Woods.  We had a long conversation about Epic Mounts, and he gave me his number, and we began to exchange texts.

With all the controversy swirling around Tiger, I feel that it is my duty to publish our text exchange so that people can see all sides of Tiger Woods.

Duncan: Sent: 06:00 PM 07/30/2009:

Nice meeting you today! I can’t believe you play WOW!! Up for a quick game of Magic?

Tiger:Sent: 06:01 PM 07/30/2009:

n room 201. You can come down the stair well next to your room. Make sure absolutely no one sees you

Duncan: Sent: 06:02PM 07/30/2009:

Cool. Thanks man.   I’ll wear an invisibility cloak. (:

Tiger: Sent: 06:17 PM 07/30/2009:

Just so you know i have to get up at 415 tomorrow.

Duncan: Sent: 06:19PM 07/30/2009:

Just so you know, I don’t give a shit.

Duncan: Sent: 07:29 PM 07/30/2009:

Have you read the Dark Tower Series by Stephen King?

Tiger: Sent: 07:30 PM 07/30/2009:

Just let me know when you are headed down

Duncan :Sent: 05:54 AM 08/09/2009:

Are you playing world of warcraft today?

Tiger: Sent: 05:54 AM 08/09/2009:

I told you im playing these two weeks

Duncan Sent: 06:45 PM 08/09/2009:

How long until you level your Death Knight to 80?

Tiger:Sent: 06:50 PM 08/09/2009:

In about a month

Duncan :Sent: 06:51 PM 08/09/2009:

A month? Are you serials? You’re level 75 right now!

 Tiger:Sent: 06:51 PM 08/09/2009:

Maybe sooner. Can’t talk now. Will text when i can

Duncan :Sent: 1:52 PM 08/13/2009:

I’m so sick of the lag on Stormrage.

Tiger:Sent: 01:53 PM 08/13/2009:

Me to

 

Duncan :Sent: 4:05 PM 08/28/2009:

You going to another Bliz Con?

Tiger:Sent: 04:10 PM 08/28/2009:

Maybe in two weeks in chicago

Duncan :Sent: 3:18 PM 08/29/2009:

Wish I had the sword of a thousand truths.

Tiger:Sent: 03:19 PM 08/29/2009:

I need that so bad

Duncan :Sent: 3:28PM 08/29/2009:

When do you want to run Arcatraz?

Tiger:Sent: 03;29 PM 08/29/2009:

Now:)

Duncan :Sent: 3:31PM 08/29/2009:

Yeah Right! You’re fucking DK can barely harvest herbs. I think we should Duel.

Tiger:Sent: 03:30 PM 08/29/2009:

Me to. I would wear you out

Duncan :Sent: 3:32PM 08/29/2009:

Any idea if the new upgrade nerfs Unholy Damage on Warlocks?

Tiger:Sent: 03:33 PM 08/29/2009:

I have no idea. I would love to have the ability to make you sore

Duncan: Sent: 03:35 PM 08/29/2009:

Hmmm. There’s probably a rune for that. Check allakhazam. Let’s do this .

Tiger: Sent: 04:02 PM 08/29/2009:

I want to treat you rough. Throw you around, spank and slap you

Duncan: Sent: 4:04PM 08/29/2009:

Bring it. Meet me in front of Ogrimar.

Tiger: Sent: 04:06 PM 08/29/2009:

Slap your face. Treat you like a dirty little whore. Put my cock in your ass and then shove it down your throat

Duncan: Sent: 4:07PM 08/29/2009:

We’ll see about that motherfucker.

Tiger: Sent: 04:08 PM 08/29/2009:

You are my fucking whore

Duncan: Sent: 4:09PM 08/29/2009:

You’re my fucking mount.

Tiger: Sent: 04:10 PM 08/29/2009:

Hold you down while i choke you and Fuck that ass that i own

Duncan:Sent: 4:11PM 08/29/2009:

Trying to get port to Ogrimar. OMG I’m gonna make you pay.

Tiger: Sent: 04:12 PM 08/29/2009:

Then im going to tell you to shut the Fuck up while i slap your face and pull your hair for making noise

Duncan:Sent: 4:13PM 08/29/2009:

Relax

Tiger:Sent: 04:15 PM 08/29/2009:
Great thing is we have a life time of this

Duncan:Sent: 04:16 PM 08/29/2009:
Yeah you’re right! !!!! WOW ROCKS!