Tour Dates

10/17/11 - Los Angeles, CA

BRUNCH

10/20/11 - Ann Arbor, MI

Ann Arbor Comedy Showcase

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Just got back from a splendid Hollywood Oscars party at a very famous hollywood actor’s house. I can’t say his name because we were all made to sign non-disclosure agreements a week before the party. For those of you who don’t live in Hollywood this might sound crazy, but it’s impossible for famous people to have real fun if they have to worry about someone reporting back about everything they do when they party

 The party took place in a 6 story mansion ringed with terraces. It was a “tiered” party which is basically a party where access is based on your IMDB star meter or your parents star meter or how high up you are in the hollywood community.

I’m proud to admit that I was on the second tier, which might not seem like a big deal, but it is when you consider that some featured actors from The Social Network and Black Swan were on the third tier, and someone whose name rhymes with James Dranko was on the sixth floor of the house.

What was so unique about this party was that people on the 6th floor of the mansion would eat very expensive gourmet food and designer drugs, and then after a time would go out onto a terrace and vomit into tubes that led to the 5th floor terrace. People on the 5th floor would suck the vomit out of the tubes and in turn vomit into their tubes, and this progression would continue all the way down the house. I know it sounds gross but it’s really exciting to taste A list celebrity vomit. Plus it gets you SUPER HIGH!

Big thanks to “Spentin Faretino” for throwing such a great party, and a shout out to Bames Mranko And Fann Rathaway for letting me drink their second hand vomit. It was DELICIOUS.